PDF《-发生什么了？-我遇到了一个男人。》

1 《初恋

50 次》 资料来源自网络,版权归哥伦比亚影业等电影出版方所有.

So tell me. How was Hawaii?快讲讲,夏威夷怎么样啊? -lt was unbelievable. Oh, yeah?简直让人难以置信.真的吗? -Well, what happened? -l met this guy. -发生什么了?-我遇到了一个男人. lt was the best week of my life.那是我一生最棒的一周. lt was just a little vacation romance. 只不过是一个小小的假期爱情. But he was so sweet.他真的好贴心. He took me to all these cool local places. 他带我去好多当地的景点. We went scuba diving...我们去水肺潜水…… -Snorkeling. -Mountain climbing.-浮潜.-爬山. We went cliff diving.还去玩了悬崖跳水. Well, we got a little drunk.我们都有点喝醉了. -He gave me... -A back rub.-他帮我…… -按摩. We slow danced... in the rain.我们还跳了慢舞…是在雨中. But it wasn'

t just about the sex.不过重点不只是做爱. He pounded me like a mallard duck.他像野鸭一样疯狂. lt ended kind of weird, though.但是故事的结尾有点奇怪. When l asked for his number, he said he'

s... 我想他要电话号码的时候,他告诉我…… -Married. -他已经结婚了.-Gay.-他是同性恋. -Entering the priesthood. -He doesn'

t believe in phones. -做了牧师.-他不喜欢电话. He just kind of ran away.他就这么跑掉了. You know, it was just a little fling, but... 虽然只是短暂的激情,可是…… l won'

t forget my week --with Henry Roth. 我永远忘不了和亨利罗斯在一起的这一周. Henry Roth, why didn'

t you tell me you were a secret agent?亨利罗斯,你为什么不早点告诉我 你是一个特工? l prefer intelligence operative, and l couldn'

t tell you until I though l knew you. 我选择了这一行,所以在我认为我了解你以前,我不想告诉你. Well, can l call you when l land? 那我下飞机以后可以给你打电话吗? You can call me, but l'

ll be in Peru. l said that a little loud. 你可以给我打电话,但是我会在秘鲁.不好,我说的有点太大声了. Come on, that'

s a 187, code blue. We got the wolf sleeping at night.快点,187,蓝色警报.夜晚有两 只狼在睡觉. He'

s slipping his arm in the drawer and out comes the cookie jar. All clear. 把他的右手伸到抽屉里,将饼干盒偷了出来,解除警报. Well, maybe when you get back from Peru.

2 那或许等你从秘鲁回来. -l don'

t think that'

s an option, Lisa. -Linda. -我认为这不是个好办法,丽莎.-是琳达. l know. l changed your name for your protection. 我知道,我故意给你改了名字,为了你的人身安全. We have to go our separate ways now.我们要各走各的路了. Got it! Moving out!收到!这就出发! -What the hell is your problem? -Just keep going, l'

ll give you $20.-神经病啊你?-别停, 一直往前开, 我给你

20 块钱. -You got it. How'

s your balls? -Killing me. Hit it. -没问题,你的蛋蛋怎么样?-疼得要死,快点开吧. Easy, Honah Lee.轻一点嘛,亨利. Hey, l'

m a person, not a seal.哎呀,我是人啊,又不是海豹. Well, l am a vet, not a doctor. So just hold still, or l won'

t give you a treat. 而我是兽医,不是人医,你还是听话点,不要动,否则不给你医了. You see what happens when you play with sharks? 这就是跟鲨鱼玩的结果? Now, why you gotta spread those lies? Sharks are like dogs.啊, 你还要散布谣言吗?鲨鱼和狗一 样, They only bite when you touch their private parts. 只有碰到他们私处的时候才咬你. That'

s a good title for my documentary. 这个做我纪录片的题目不错: Sharks: They Only Bite When You Touch Their Private Parts.鲨鱼,只有碰到他们私处的时候才咬你. Or you could call it, Sharks: They Tried to Eat My Kidney.或者叫:鲨鱼!差点吃掉我的肾. All right, enough already. You too, Willie. 好了,我已经够惨的了,你也别笑,威利. He just cast a spell on us.哦,他在对我们施咒语. All right. Put this on four times a day for two weeks. 好了,每天把这个换

4 次,坚持

2 周. -You can handle that. -What'

s wrong with that turtle? -你能做到的.-那只乌龟怎么了? He has lung problems because he smoked too much turtle weed... .which is bad for you. Right? 他得肺病了,因它吸了太多龟大麻,太多毒品对身体不好的,对吧? What? l don'

t smoke weed.什么?我从来不吸大麻. Hey, Honah Lee? How'

s that hot wahine nympho from Ohio?嗨,亨利,俄亥俄来的那个女色鬼怎么样了? Great. She'

s good! l dropped her off at the airport this morning.她很好啊.我今天早上把她送到机场了. Come on, l need some details.多说点嘛,我要听细节. You get some booby, some assy, a pull on your poi-poi? Come on.有没有摸到胸部,还是屁股,想想吧. Daddy, what'

s a nympho?爸爸,什么是女色鬼? Oh. The nympho is the state bird of Ohio. 哦,女色鬼是俄亥俄州的州鸟. You'

re the state idiot of Hawaii.而你是夏威夷州的白痴之最. Here you go. Bite the fish, chew the fish, love the fish. Enjoy.威利,给你,吃鱼吧,用力咬,用力嚼.慢慢享用

3 吧. -You crack me up, kamaaina. -Oh, yeah? -你真让我觉得好笑.-是吗? -One of these days... -Yeah?-有一天…… -怎么样? ...you'

re gonna show one of those tourists such a good time...会有某个旅游者因为和你共渡美好的时光 ..she'

ll wanna stay on the island.而呆在岛上不想走了. Why do you say mean things like that and why is your foot on my pillow? 你为什么总要说这么刻薄的话?还有,为什么你的脚在我的枕头上? l don'

t want your ass on it, either. Get up! Get up! 屁股也不行.快起来!起来! lt could happen.没准儿会发生哦. Then you won'

t be able to go on your boat trip to Alaska.那样的话你就不能完成去阿拉斯加旅游的计划. You'

ll be stuck here, waking up next to the same old, ugly broad, just like Ula. 你就会被囚禁在这里,每天早上起来的时候面对你那又老又难看的老婆,就像我的一样. -Just kidding, guys. -About the old part or the ugly part?-我只是在开玩笑的.-哪部分?老?还是难看? Henry, come quickly! lt'

s Jocko!亨利!快点来!乔可出事了! Jocko! What'

s going on with you, buddy?乔可哥们你怎么了? Don'

t be scared. Everything'

s gonna be fine. 别害怕,不会有事的. Just stay calm. All right.冷静一点. Willie, l don'

t need you to see this. Get out of here, now!威利,我不想让你看到这些.快点离开这儿! Okay, check the temperature of the pool. Go! Hurry! 你去看看水里的温度.快点! What are you doing? l meant check the thermometer!阿力克斯!你做什么!我是说看一下温度计! Give me a hand. Let'

s go!快点帮帮我.走! Get me two fish from the barrel. Now. 我需要你从大桶里面拿两条鱼!快. -Okay. -Just hang in there.-好的.-坚持住. -Here. -lt'

s gonna be all right.-这里.-不会有事的. That'

s a little warm. Go to the bottom of the barrel, please.这两只不够凉,请你从桶底拿. Okay, there. That'

s good. Thank you.哦.很好.谢谢. Come on, buddy, take it. Take it.来吧哥们儿,吃吧. -He'

s not responding! -l know, Alexa! -他不吃!-我知道,阿力克斯! Sorry, l smacked you. You needed the fish-slap to calm down.对不起,我打了你.但是你需要打一下才能冷静 下来. -Do you understand? Are you calm? -Yes. Fish-slap calm me.-明白吗?你现在冷静了吗?-明白,冷静多了. l'

m gonna try to get him breathing manually... 好.我现在要人工帮他呼吸…… ...so l need your face next to his mouth to see if it'

s working.我需要你把脸靠近它的嘴,看看有没有效. -Are you ready? -Yes.-准备好了吗?-准备好了. -One, two, three! -Nothing, nothing!-1,2,3!-不起作用! All right! Try it one more time. lf it doesn'

t work we'

ll perform a emergency tracheotomy. 好了好了,再试一次.如果还是没效的话,我们就做紧急气管切开手术.

4 We don'

t wanna do that, so let'

s pray this works. One more time.这是我们不想做的,所以但愿这次有效.再来 一次. That'

s a lot of vomit.他怎么吐了这么多? This is why l got into this business. To save sea animals. 这就是我为什么选择了这份工作,来拯救海洋生物. You should go wash yourself off, okay?你去洗一洗吧. Maybe try some turpentine. That might take the stink away.用一些松脂或许可以除去臭味. Yeah, high-five is right, buddy.你很厉害呀,伙计. l knew you were gonna burp, but the vomit thing was awesome!我知道你想打嗝,不过你那一吐也太棒了! That'

s what she gets for eating my roast beef sandwich.哈哈,这就是你偷吃我的烧牛肉三明治的下场. Willie, did you see that?哈哈,威利,你看到没有? Captain'

s log: November 5th, 6:

45 a.m. 船长日记,11 月5日早上 6:45. I'

ve taken the Sea Serpent for a trip around the island of Oahu.我乘着 海蛇号 在埃瓦胡岛屿做绕行. It is by far the longest voyage she has yet undertaken...这是她经历过得最长的旅行…… ...and its successful completion will signal that she'

s ready...她的完成意味着 ...for our great journey to Bristol Bay... 我们可以去布里斯特湾旅行了…… ...whose unspoiled walrus habitat will yield an abundance of--那里原始的海象栖息地将盛产…… Damn it!可恶!Are you kidding me?开什么玩笑? Aloha, honey. What can l get for you?你好!想要点什么? l guess l'

ll take a cup of coffee.我想要一杯咖啡吧. -You guess? -Yeah, l already ate breakfast. -你确定么?-是的,我已经吃过早餐了. l need to kill some time before the Coast Guard gets here to tow my boat.我只是想消磨些时间,等着海岸警备队 来拖我的船. What did you eat?你早餐吃了什么? l had a Reese'

s Peanut Butter Cup and some Gatorade.我吃的花生酱夹心巧克力. They'

re not b........